So my Mom sends me an email the other day — a 10-step way to speed up the grieving process for a broken heart.
Fan-freaking-tastic.
Here they are:
1. Put down the phone: No seriously. Put it down. Now. Calling your ex may seem like a good idea, but once you have a clear head you´ll regret this behaviour.
Too late — where was this piece of advice a week ago?
2. Find a breakup buddy: This is the person you should call instead of your ex.
See I am far more talented than whoever wrote these tens steps would guess —I managed to convince my so-called breakup buddy that calling my ex was a good idea.
3. Wallow: You´ll do it anyways and it´s a healthy way to get all the sadness over with so you´re free to move on.
Done and done. See the first few posts on this blog and, well let’s be honest, there will likely be more posts of this nature.
4. Organize your life: Remember all those Sundays spent lying around not doing all the things you needed to get done because you were with him?
I do remember those Sundays lying in bed with him. However, I also go all those things done at other times, the joy of being borderline obsessive compulsive. Everything else was organized the week after we broke up.
5. Hide the evidence: Hey, while you´re organizing, why not stash all those photos and gifts someplace you can´t see them? Don´t throw them out, just put them away. There´s no need to be in agony every time you look at a framed photo of the two of you in happier times.
This one I did – see the Unfriend and Is it really better?
6. Pamper yourself: Nothing will make you feel better like a confidence boost, so take yourself to the salon or spa, or give yourself an at-home makeover.
I have a dentist appointment next week, does that count?
7. Get out of the house: Now that you´re feeling pampered and pretty, take your hot self out of the house.
My “hot self” generally stays away from advice that refers to me that way. That aside, I’d really love to get out of the house more, but currently I am living in a small town, a point furthest from the centre of everything, with no really going out options. And it’s -40 C so I think my hot self will stay in, at least until spring.
8. Make a dream collage: This is all about you. Grab a big Bristol board and start cutting out images and words from magazines that show all the things you want for yourself.
I’ve been making collages for ages. There is something therapeutic about cutting things up and gluing them into place — yay for comfort in child-like behaviours.
9. Make big changes: If this was a life-changing breakup for you, it feels impossible, even after a lot of time has passed, for you to get over it, it may be time to make a big change.
Yes, soon. Also I really have to get out of said small town and frozen weather, but because of the breakup thing too.
10. Go on dates: Don´t rush into this. Once you´re ready to date, you´ll know.
Don’t rush into this, hey? I guess my usual theory, of the best way to get over the last one is to get under the next one, need not apply. Actually this one I figured out early on. I’m taking a break from men while I sort myself out. Sure I can go on random dates, but I’m not looking for anything serious because I am planning to move on.
Most of this advice is fairly intuitive and it does ring true. Damn, I hate it when my Mom is right.
Guess I’d better call her.
i feel your pain.
getting over and moving forward has been the hardest shit i have ever been thru.
hes already sleeping/seeing someone else… it been a little over 3 months since we broke up. we were together 10 years. wow.. i think im the loser here.
It’s reassuring to know we don’t go through this on our own, hey? The good news is … just cause the guy you are with turns out to be someone different than you thought, doesn’t make us the losers – thank god.
u are so right… its his loss. not mine.
hope u visit my blog… u and i seem to share tons when it comes to pain 😉
im adding you to my blog roll. yay!
after reading some of your posts i reallly realllly want a glass of wine. haha.
hey im from canada too.