Running and weightloss, Week 12: Lighter and some new goals

Week 12: Sept. 29, 2013 – 196 pounds.

I’m a little lighter, but more importantly I’m a large instead of an XL in my tops, and a medium for leggings … that’s insane for me to wrap my mind around.

More importantly than focusing on my weight, I’m working on ways to do some of those things I really want to do, and looking a new ways of improving myself – enter the 101 in 1001.

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Not classy: An icky moment from a girls’ night out

I went out last night with a bunch of girls, I’d never met and for the most part it was a lot of fun. But, I encountered a moment that was significantly less than classy.

If you are going out for drinks at a bar and you order a round of shots, you buy them. If someone opts out before you order you respect that.

I was hitting my limit, and so made it clear that I was out for more drinks when the waitress came to the table. The next thing I know, there are eight shots being passed around. I said” no, thank you,” and the girl who ordered them turned to me and let me know my share was still $7.

That is not okay. Don’t order drinks for others and force them to pay.

Arg.

I’ll be back with a much more positive post later.

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Mad for musicals: Les Misérables

I don’t know if you all have seen this, or if the name is a dead giveaway, but Les Misérables is totally heartbreaking … and not just once, but again, and again.

I saw it for the first time tonight and my puffy, red eyes and my tear-stained face are a testament to how moved I was, but the genius part is, every heart break is followed by a tiny moment of levity – just so you can have the briefest breather.

All in all, Les Misérables is an incredible performance.

Oh, and I think I found my dream man. The guy who leads the students in the revolution, he’s driven for the cause, yet caring. The guy who played the role in the production I saw had an Orlando Bloom (during his Pirates of the Caribbean era) look about him.

A few other observations – I’d like to learn to sing … and dance.

I again wonder if I missed my calling and I should be on the stage (stage fright when playing an instrument be damned).

Also, the drive of the students behind the barricade, I remember having that drive. I want it back again, to feel so passionately about a cause – I miss that.

Last thought, how heartbreaking/hauntingly beautiful is the role of Éponine in the musical. She is treated horribly by her parents, has unrequited love and then dies. Blerg.

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Busy days, long nights

This has been an insane week.

Between work during the day and functions for work in the evening (and on some days early morning), this is the first time I’ve had a chance to sit at the computer.

And in about two minutes I have to go again.

At some point I’ll have more to post (like my 101 in 1001). In the meantime, check out this blog, Classy Girls Wear Pearls, if you are looking to figure out a great fall wardrobe.

 

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Running and weightloss: getting ready for real results

Okay, the title might be a little misleading …

I’m at week whatever – 11, I think, and I am still 198 pounds.

My personal trainer and I were talking about it this week and she asked how my clothes were fitting.

I answered that they were more lose, but now I’m not sure if it’s because they actually are or that I really want them to be.

She could see the moment of weakness in my eye, “we could see for sure how you are doing … don’t you have a body composition to do still?” She said, all innocent like.

I am definitely not ready for that, but knowing it’s coming might be the thing that kicks my but into gear in the kitchen (here’s hoping).

A set back though, a tumblr account that I followed religiously has vanished — I was really motivated by the great food, activity and healthy people posted.

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Here’s my deal: explaining my love of the single life

“What’s your deal?”

It was a question, but the look that accompanied it conveyed a cross between curiosity and judgment.

“I mean, are you married or what?”

The line of questioning was coming across the table at me from a girl who works at the same company. We were attending a high-end fundraiser for a community foundation.

I was a little taken back. We’d all been drinking, but I never realized that my always going to things solo had been seen in such a negative light. I always just figured I was me, and that’s how my being on my own was taken.

I mumbled out some response about not settling down in this city, how it was just another temporary stop on my journey through life, which is true. I didn’t mention the guy I’m kind of seeing, or that the guy I was kind of seeing, or …

I always figured that by attending these events, Christmas parties etc. on my own, I would be taken for who I am, and what I have to bring to the table. In such a male-dominated field, what I bring as me is VERY important. I feel like even if I was with “the love of my life,” I wouldn’t be out parading him about.

I like being single, I like meeting and hanging out with interesting people when I want without feeling guilty. I don’t see myself being the settling down and raising a family type.

Being “single” has always worked for me and I was surprised that another woman who would question it. Had she just stopped once I explained my deal, that would have been fine, but as she continued to explain why I should “find a guy,” others joined in.

Even the other single women at the table were talking about why I needed to date more often and “settle down.”  I wonder if it’s jealousy. What I do flies in the face of what is the norm. Were the single girls jealous that not only am I not ashamed of my single status, I flaunt it? Were the married/nearly married girls jealous over my freedom?

Fortunately another performance had begun and by the time it was over, the conversation had moved on. And aside from two people saying they had “the perfect man” for me to meet, nothing more was said – but those comments I’ve come to expect (and love). I mean it’s a compliment that everyone has a friend they would like me to hang out with, and that’s how I’ll take it.

So, I guess, that’s my deal.

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Saying goodbye to 30

So this is my last day at 30, the last day I can still pretend I’m in my 20s – you know the 21 – 30 box on questionnaires.

Mostly I feel really good about it.

I use my birthday like many people use New Year’s Day, a chance to reset, think about the things I want to accomplish and how I want to grow.

The Glamour list of: Turning 30: 30 Things Every Woman Should Have And Should Know, I’ve mostly finished. If you haven’t read it, it’s worth taking the time.

This year I’ve encountered something called the 101 in 1001. It’s a list of 101 things you want to accomplish in 1001 days (so about three years) – like a bucket list with a timeline, so perhaps they will actually be accomplished, instead of being thought about with a wistful sigh. While I might not be putting everything on my bucket list onto the 101 list, I am thinking about the little things I have wanted to do, but haven’t because I believe having it on this list will let me feel good about taking the time to do them.

 

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Making something good from the bad

My brother has resurfaced = good

His girlfriend has to leave the country before her visitor visa expires = bad

She flew out today.

I wish I could protect him from the hurt he is going to feel tomorrow morning when he wakes up, in their bed, alone.

However, he is prepared for this and is already making plans to have the experience help him grow. It’s a family trait, making the best out of adversity – the breakup that kicked off my being a runner is just one example.

My brother says yoga to help him find calmness in his life (and increased flexibility), music for sanity (and income) and every odd (or regular) job he can work to save the money so they can visit each other. In a lot of ways I’m excited for him, if he is able to stick to his plan and use the experience of being apart from someone you love, to help him grow, he will be an even more incredible person than he is now.

And the really good news for him is he plans to stay on the ocean for now. This is good because he (like me) is of the ocean and when everything else in life makes you feel terrible, the ocean brings back that feeling of life.

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Buyer’s remorse or don’t yell at co-workers

I don’t have much to say today other than I have some buyer’s remorse for freaking out and swearing at one of my co-workers during the weekend.

At the time it felt so good, and a not-so-insignificant part of me still feels it was necessary, but I know I could have handled the situation better.

And no, I hadn’t been drinking at the time. Although with the way my day off was going, I likely should have been.

I need more zen.

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Blood Donor attempt 1: Fail

I psyched myself up for giving blood today. Ate well, hydrated properly, swallowed all my nervousness and made it to my appointment early.

Didn’t get much past this step

Got up to the first screening session, wearing my ‘I’m a first time donor’ sticker, had my finger poked and waited to see the number 130 pop up on the machine that tests for iron.

I would have been okay with 126, as 125 is a pass, but my bet was 130 – I was at 132 a month ago when I had my blood taken.

121.

I failed.

I didn’t even make it past the first screening point – it’s like failing a test you didn’t know was coming, so you couldn’t study for…

With a number that low, I’m on my way to anemic, which I guess explains why I’m tired all the time.

So, in 56 days I am eligible once again to try to donate blood.

In the meantime I’ll be eating liver, wrapped in spinach cooked in a cast iron frying pan with a side of raisins (or maybe I’ll head to my doctor to get supplements).

Anybody have suggestions for food (preferably vegetarian food) that’s high in iron?

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